Yes, Mary! Great post. Thanks for kicking off the new year so well!
Asking for help is difficult. It can unlock and get us unstuck from our negative patterns of thought or practice, but it takes vulnerability. I do not like being vulnerable with others, but I have leaned into that as a practice over time. I train jiu jitsu and work alongside a bunch of macho alpha types and I have a vision to offer support for my jiu jitsu teammates by providing a safe place for life coaching. I am currently drafting how to do that with my fellow business/life coaches, with whom I am studying and practicing the art and science of coaching. I would be curious to hear/read your perspective on the "practice" of vulnerability, especially for men.
Vulnerability is the hero in all of our own personal stories! I am so excited for your new journey, Matt! While it's no doubt a bit scary it's also such a perfect opportunity to bring your talents to life in a truly meaningful way to so many people. I love this question about practicing vulnerability. especially how men can practice in a way that feels authentic. I'm going to look into some resources and expert povs and create a post on this in a few weeks!
So many great responses. I thought about what I might say. For me, at almost 75, I rely on an arsenal of tools. I’ve collected them over the years. My toolbox can always use new trusty tools.
Hi Mary, I notice this word 'resilience' appearing in our vocabulary more and more in the last year or so. My own Substack is called 'From Resilience to Reward'. Yours is 'Fierce Resilience'. Looks like we're all 'feeling it'....
We are! The term is definitely getting buzzy. I think the past few years have been really hard and we're looking for signs that we're strong and moving in the right direction, even if we feel like we're stuck where we are.
Thank you Mary, for your enthusiastic invitation to share our victories, large and small. You are right, we are a community and our strength comes through sharing! Happy New Year! 🎉😊
Can we “teach” resilience or do some kids just have it? I learned it by being abused as a child, through persevering. How do others “learn” resilience?
First, I wanted to say that I’m so sorry that you went through that, Susan.
🩷
I like your question. That’s one of the hot topics I see discussed in the realm of Resilience. Resilience is defined as the ability to get through difficult experiences; the ability to adapt. And we know there are things that might “break” one person that don’t disable another, and so the big difference probably lies in a person’s capacity for resilience. I have gravitated to the studies that show that resilience can be cultivated, and that the way we view a situation and make sense of it can help us move through it. And so, yes, I think it can be “taught” by teaching coping strategies as well as different ways to process experiences. And by understanding that we can view the world and our place in it through different perspectives, then, hopefully, we're better equipped to process and make sense of the next trial in our path. Which I think ultimately helps us view ourselves as resilient. :)
I really needed this one, as I am definitely “in it” right now, and have been for the past year. But right now, as I write this from my hospital bed, while my daughter who has needed 24/7 care, is at home, being looked after by struggling relatives, is the hardest… ughh.
Kimberly, I can’t even imagine. I’m sending you all the strength and courage and mental & emotional fortitude possible to get you and your family through these excruciating days. I hope that at some point it gets better and until then, I hope you can take it one small step at a time… xx M
Yes, Mary! Great post. Thanks for kicking off the new year so well!
Asking for help is difficult. It can unlock and get us unstuck from our negative patterns of thought or practice, but it takes vulnerability. I do not like being vulnerable with others, but I have leaned into that as a practice over time. I train jiu jitsu and work alongside a bunch of macho alpha types and I have a vision to offer support for my jiu jitsu teammates by providing a safe place for life coaching. I am currently drafting how to do that with my fellow business/life coaches, with whom I am studying and practicing the art and science of coaching. I would be curious to hear/read your perspective on the "practice" of vulnerability, especially for men.
Vulnerability is the hero in all of our own personal stories! I am so excited for your new journey, Matt! While it's no doubt a bit scary it's also such a perfect opportunity to bring your talents to life in a truly meaningful way to so many people. I love this question about practicing vulnerability. especially how men can practice in a way that feels authentic. I'm going to look into some resources and expert povs and create a post on this in a few weeks!
So many great responses. I thought about what I might say. For me, at almost 75, I rely on an arsenal of tools. I’ve collected them over the years. My toolbox can always use new trusty tools.
💖
More tools in the toolbox are, as Martha Stewart would say, a good thing!
Hi Mary, I notice this word 'resilience' appearing in our vocabulary more and more in the last year or so. My own Substack is called 'From Resilience to Reward'. Yours is 'Fierce Resilience'. Looks like we're all 'feeling it'....
We are! The term is definitely getting buzzy. I think the past few years have been really hard and we're looking for signs that we're strong and moving in the right direction, even if we feel like we're stuck where we are.
Thank you Mary, for your enthusiastic invitation to share our victories, large and small. You are right, we are a community and our strength comes through sharing! Happy New Year! 🎉😊
Happy new year, Sheila! I’m so grateful that you’re here!
Can we “teach” resilience or do some kids just have it? I learned it by being abused as a child, through persevering. How do others “learn” resilience?
First, I wanted to say that I’m so sorry that you went through that, Susan.
🩷
I like your question. That’s one of the hot topics I see discussed in the realm of Resilience. Resilience is defined as the ability to get through difficult experiences; the ability to adapt. And we know there are things that might “break” one person that don’t disable another, and so the big difference probably lies in a person’s capacity for resilience. I have gravitated to the studies that show that resilience can be cultivated, and that the way we view a situation and make sense of it can help us move through it. And so, yes, I think it can be “taught” by teaching coping strategies as well as different ways to process experiences. And by understanding that we can view the world and our place in it through different perspectives, then, hopefully, we're better equipped to process and make sense of the next trial in our path. Which I think ultimately helps us view ourselves as resilient. :)
I really needed this one, as I am definitely “in it” right now, and have been for the past year. But right now, as I write this from my hospital bed, while my daughter who has needed 24/7 care, is at home, being looked after by struggling relatives, is the hardest… ughh.
Kimberly, I can’t even imagine. I’m sending you all the strength and courage and mental & emotional fortitude possible to get you and your family through these excruciating days. I hope that at some point it gets better and until then, I hope you can take it one small step at a time… xx M