Hi guys! This week I included a video, a behind the scenes on why I’m so excited for the topics I featured in this week’s newsletter. Also, if you’re new here—I’m so glad you’re here. Fierce Resilience is a place for resources, personal stories, studies and tidbits of inspiration for getting through life’s hard moments, big and small.
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If you’re in the U.S., maybe you had a holiday this week. Maybe it’s even a long weekend. My wish is that, yes, you’re savoring an Americana-drenched, Abercrombie-laced fever dream of a long weekend. In fact, I hope you’re in the middle of a really exciting summer—NAY!—a really fantastic year!
BUT.
Maybe that’s not the return on investment you’re getting midway into the year. Maybe 2024 is feeling like a slog.
And that’s ok. That’s why I pulled a few jazzy tidbits for a little more umph during this hump in the year.
Starting off with…
Adam Grant on Resilience
Adam Grant is one of those names that comes across my Instagram, YouTube, and Substack, usually because of algorithms. Not shockingly, I like thoughtful information, science-backed studies and positivity based in science. I signed up for his newsletter and a few weeks ago, saw a round up in his Substack that mentioned resilience and, por supuesto, my eyes lit up and I looked a little closer.
I LOVED this quote:
“Confidence doesn't always come from believing in yourself today. It often stems from recalling the obstacles you overcame yesterday.
A history of resilience can silence self-doubt—challenges conquered are clues to hidden strengths. Past progress is proof of future potential.”
It should be noted that I tried to put in bold only the most inspirational phrases in that quote and ended up with the whole thing. It’s that good. (Also, if you’ve ever texted with me, you know that if I could, there would be numerous explosion emojis interlaced for emphasis. Alas, we’ll have to muddle on without mini graphics in text.)
Grant also included this image, which I love because it sums up so well the struggle we feel when getting through hard times. Instead of The Little Engine That Could, more often we’re tell ourselves that we’re The Little Engine That Can’t (Or is that just me?), humming, “I think I can’t, I think I can’t” until finally we realize that we CAN and we DO. Evidently we have amnesia, completely forgetting that we’ve gotten through tough times before (or perhaps we’ve even overcome something almost exactly like this circumstance before, like say, a presentation at work or a big proposal).
If you’re feeling small and challenged and maybe even a little scared, I want to remind you that YES. YOU. CAN.
Then, surely thanks to an algorithm, I was suggested the Diary of a CEO Podcast with guest Adam Grant. I was cooking, other things were going on, but I tuned in and found myself stopping and replaying a section when I heard him say
“Resilience is not an individual skill. It’s not a muscle you work on just by yourself. It requires a support system. I think of it as scaffolding: a temporary structure that helps you scale a height you couldn’t reach on your own.”
THAT’S WHAT I’VE BEEN SAYING, GUYS.
There’s a refresher in this previous post:
Get more insight from Adam in the link below. If you feel like skipping around, dive in @ 40m 09s where he’s explaining that research shows that more often than not a traumatic experience doesn’t shatter us the way we fear that it might. In fact, most times we do get through those terrible times, and better than we could have conceived. (Heart emoji! Heart emoji!)
Moving on….
Actress and TONY Award-nominee Amy Ryan
Leading up to the recent TONY Awards a few weeks ago, I was catching up on all the buzz, savagely trying to educate myself on the plays I haven’t seen and will not see for quite some time (save for Cabaret! I actually went to New York and saw a play with one of my best friends just footloose and fancy free as if I wasn’t a sleep-deprived mom with a toddler…wait, where was I going with this?)
Oh, I was reading about the noms in EW and learned that Amy Ryan (you know her from The Office, Gone Baby Gone or Birdman, or dozens of other movies, shows and plays) had stepped in to a lead role in Doubt: A Parable last minute, just a week before the play was to start previews and had to dance with the fear of figuring it out in just seven days. Here, I’ll let EW and Amy explain it better.
ENTERTAINMENT WEEKLY: Amy, you have the most unique casting story of anyone here in that you came in at the very last minute after Tyne Daly's illness. How did that come about and why did you say yes?
RYAN: I got a phone call late Sunday night asking if I would step in. They hadn't started previews yet, and from that phone call to me being in costume on stage in front of an audience was seven days later. I never played the role before. I sit at a desk a lot. So I had the scripts the first few nights on the desk. Why did I say yes? Because I knew it was a great part. I knew it was a great play. After saying yes, the harder question was, now that I said yes, how do I do this? There was only time to trust instincts and that's it. If they were wrong, they were going to be wrong, but it was like, make a choice and stick with it. I was white-knuckling it, and it was truly terrifying. I started crying during the first show, to myself, standing in the dark saying, "What have I done?" But there was so much goodwill in the audience at those first few previews. And I thought, "Stop thinking too much and just do it." That's all I had time to do.
See, we’re all scared. Even very experienced, very talented and very skilled professionals say Yes and then get really scared and doubt themselves. And can still be so good that they get nominated for a freaking TONY Award.
So, next time you’re FREAKING OUT IN YOUR HEAD, remember these sage words: "Stop thinking too much and just do it." (*EXPLOSION EMOJIS-BAM-BAM-BAM*)
Robin & Cody — Peloton Peeps That Keep Me Going
Earlier this year my husband found a lightly used Peloton on FB marketplace. I thought, yes, I’d like to be able to ride a bike again, especially since it’s pretty impossible as a new mom to get out and exercise (not just on a bike but anywhere).
And so gradually I’ve spent more and more time each week on the bike. I have grand ambitions of riding or working out daily, but I’m not there yet. It’s a journey.
More than the workouts themselves, it’s the personalities that keep me coming back. The instructors are so good and supportive that I know I’ll come out of the workout with a confidence boost in addition to some endorphin flow.
I regularly reach for my phone and try to memorialize their kernels. Here are a few that give me all the good vibes to keep going even when it’s tough, on the bike or off:
From Robin Arzón, the QUEEN!
“I want to dedicate this ride to anyone going through silent battles that no one sees.” — Guys, I cried.
“It’s ok to crack, that’s where the light comes through.”
“Stay weird. No one remembers normal.” This was her mom’s guidance to her when she was young.
“Discipline is the greatest form of self-love.” — Yessssss.
“You already know what happens when you give up. Let’s see what happens when you keep going.” — When you’re on the bike and going hard, or in life going hard, this is so good, seriously, I can’t even.
And then there’s Cody Rigsby. I was aware of Cody from IG before even joining Peloton. Find him there if you want some feel good vibes and quippy sass a la brunch with your gay bestie.
(When the ride gets tough) “Lean into the joy. Lean into feeling good about yourself.”
“I want you to try something new. Maybe not bangs but something new.” — This is why I ride with Cody so often. I need his blend of gentle snark with loving support.
“What do you need to change to keep going? Focus on what you can do about it now.” — This makes me want to cry. Yes, CODY, yes.
There are many more goodies from Cody, I just don’t always grab my phone fast enough to memorialize. And because Peloton knows that they trade in inspiration as much as they do sweat, they rounded up some bons mots from their instructors in a blog here.
An Ancient Video I Made
I have no recollection of what deep search led me to find this video and article earlier week. More than anything, I’m sharing this because I like laughing at myself (and maybe you like laughing with me too?). So I’m sharing here for the random fun of it BUT ALSO if you find yourself navigating food sensitivities or a new diagnosis and not quite sure how to articulate your food needs, it’s a fun video and article I did for Empowher on just that topic.
Share with Me
If there are any fun resources that you’ve found out in the world, share with me! You can reply to this email, comment on the post in Substack, DM me on IG or just send a mental note across time and space. :)
Happy Weekend!
Until next time, xx M
Fun Weekend Vibes: Inspiration from Awesome People