Hello! Welcome, new subscribers, readers and followers! I’m so glad you’re here. Fierce Resilience is a place for resources, personal stories, studies and tidbits of inspiration for getting through life’s hard moments, big and small.
Summer update! In honor of the long summer days and short summer nights, I'm pausing our Zooms in July and August so you can savor summer however you do. We’ll jump back in right as back-to-school stress lays down upon us. Sounds like a perfect time for some group support!
Today’s topic: a glimmer when we need it
There is nothing new here.
Nothing I’m going to write hasn’t been written before. But sometimes when you chew on things enough, they break down differently.
Plainly stated—sometimes, after a whole lot of frustration and the assumption that abject failure is right around the corner, there are epiphanies that hit us just when we need them.
Sometimes, finally, the simple truths of the universe explain themselves in a language we speak natively.
Sometimes we begin to understand that we’re not so very much alone, even when we’re searching to find ourselves in the pitch black.
Even more plainly stated—sometimes we hear the guidance we need when we need it.
In this case I finally just “got it.”
And thank goodness.
Because everything can feel hard. Over and over again our days can feel overwhelming and maybe like we’re drowning (if, say, we’re struggling with a chronic health issue, or a mental health issues, a difficult stage of parenting or infertility or a toxic work environment or depression or financial insecurity or so, so many other things). And from talking to many of you, from my experience and the experiences of my friends, I know that, yes, indeed, these are the things you’re going through. We’re all in it. The struggle.
Whatever the situation, it’s most likely the uncertainty that is really the worst part, those scary “what-ifs” that creep in when you’re trying to sleep or rest or focus or just get through the day.
But if we can separate ourselves from the WHAT-IF overwhelm, that’s when we actually see the answers. When we can pull back and minimize the stress, we can take action to actually move through the worst moment and into a new state. That means less downing, more breathing with a normal cadence…which feels absolutely impossible when you’re in the middle of it all. (I know)
And here’s another insight that came to me: what if, just maybe, this is as bad as it gets.
Maybe with all the trial and drowning and overwhelm, maybe this is actually the worst moment, right now, and it’s not going to be a continuous cycle of hurt? Maybe things—as bad as they’ve been (if you’re right in the thick of it right now) start to get better.
Because they can.
That’s something I forget. When I’m in the cycle of trial and just surviving, I forget that things can get better. And maybe that starts now.
Look for the bright spots to keep shining the way.
And beyond this—the understanding that maybe things get better starting now and that it’s the uncertainly driving us crazy much of the time—here are a couple more epiphanies that come surfing in when we turn down the stress.
Maybe we start hearing some of the good stuff, like:
Kindness to yourself pays dividends
It really is on only your own divine timeline
Yes, the universe really is set up for your success, if you’re open to it
Our true self really is the only one that matters
And, your voice is the most precious thing in the entire world.
This unique thing you’ve got; your finger prints and dental grooves and specific brain chemistry and mental acrobatic are pearlescent and illuminating. And unlike any other.
There are hundreds of thousands of memes that reassure us of each kernel I just mentioned.
As I said, nothing I’m saying is new.
But what is, is that feeling you get the moment your heart or soul opens to accept that you are worthy.
You are loved, just as you are.
And that you are a simple miracle to behold.
I’ll leave you there because my only wish is that you move on to the next email or task in your day with a spark glimmering inside.
Promise me you’ll let that spark grow.
Till next time we meet,
XxM
(PS - if this helped you at all, please let me know. Write me, message me, send a courier pigeon. I love your messages! In fact, this post came flowing out of me after reading a letter from someone in this community who was kind enough to reach out and share some thoughts <3 )
Everything is hard. (A love letter)